coffee

Cuts in meat inspections loom, the horsemeat controversy takes a backseat to the sequester, the White House shutters garden tours and more after the jump. 

In elementary school music class, we had to learn a song about coffee. The chorus was something along the lines of “C-O-F-F-E-E, coffee is not for me.” If “Row, Row, Row Your Boat” is about the intrinsic value of boat paddling, this coffee song was designed to keep kids off the beans. It worked on me. I don't like coffee. I never have. What's a guy to do for his morning cup of Joe when he and Joe had a falling out?

We've had coffee on the brain this week (and it's only Tuesday!), so if you're sick of coffee stories, too bad. Besides, this is less a coffee story than a pretty funny video from last night's Jimmy Kimmel show featuring 50 Cent and Fred Armisen in a spoof of Zero Dark Thirty, fitting called Zero Dark Fiddy. The funniest part? It alleges that Osama Bin Laden was actually holed up in a Van Nuys, California storage locker, and what gave him away was his daily Starbucks delivery. Watch...