When was the last time you saw a cool couples blog? Never, right? Well, forget the wedding-planning Pinterest boards and the staged smooches; this is war. The anonymous authors of Meanwhile in Mafhattanstan are eating their way through “B’s” deployment to Afghanistan. His girlfriend, “G,” a Manhattan food writer, reminds him what he’s missing. Check out a few side-by-side comparisons.

collar
Left: Kabuli pulao and mantoo with naan. Right: Marinated broiled yellowtail collar.

ABFEG1
Left: Chicken cordon bleu, watermelon, stewed tomato, and Afghan beans. Right: Baked macaroni and cheese with fried summer sausage, kale, whole-grain mustard, and Tapatío.
ABFEG2
Left: Applesauce with raisins, bacon, pineapple, melon, orange, and English muffins. Right: Seared Hawaiian ahi with caviar and spring vegetable salad.
ABFEG3
Left: Macaroni with added cheese, mushrooms, onions, bacon, asparagus and pineapple. Right: Homemade unagi don, togarashi, scallions, and fried egg.

We reached out to B, a captain in the Army, to make sure this isn’t some special kind of torture. G’s food looks really good, and his…less so.

“We had some friends who thought I would be sad to see so much good food every day when I couldn’t eat it, but honestly, doing this project with G has given me so much to look forward to,” he says, via email. “I don’t have to imagine the deliciousness I’m coming home to. I can see it.”

Check out interludes involving homemade Afghan red velvet pancakes (!?), Trailer Park Boys, cargo pockets packed with tiny small-batch condiment bottles, a storage locker full of whole-grain mustard and M4 assault rifle bullets, and one strategically placed Rickroll, then tell that couple with the blog about how they started jogging together to just…stop.